035 – The Right House for Autistic Kids with Victor Antunez

Anouk:
Welcome to the podcast. Today, we have our last installment of our more for now, anyway, of our more personal and family stories. And to do that, we are talking all about autism today. With a autism and and where we can live or what studying that might be more, safe for autistic or child that might have a tendency to leave the house.

And to do that, we are welcoming Victor Intense. He blends his expertise in Miami real estate with his experience as a father to an autistic child. This unique combination allows him to guide families with emotionally and dense kids through own buying challenges. Victor's mission is to empower family like his own, transforming challenges into opportunities for connection and growth. He also has a book that we will be talking about on the podcast. Let's welcome Victor.

Anouk:
Welcome to Parenting the Intense. Where we'll talk all about how we can drop the general parenting advice, that doesn't work with our emotionally intense kids anyway, and let go of the unrealistic expectations society puts on us as parents. Together, we'll find solutions and ideas that work for you and your kids. Chances are deep down you know what they need. But you need a little encouragement to keep going on other days and permission to do things differently and help you fully trust that you already are a wonderful parent to your exceptional but challenging kids.

Do you read all the things, listen to all the things, take all the courses? And you know a lot of things about parenting but you struggle to actually apply them in your real life, then you're in luck. I just started the Parenting the Intensity community, which is a monthly group support for parents of emotionally intense kids. And the goal is exactly that, to take all the information you learn from the podcast and from all the other sources and adapt them so that it works for your child and your family, your reality. Because things can work, but not always the same way for everybody. So the same thing might need to be adapted to work for you. And sometimes it's hard to sort through everything to choose the right things so that you can really enjoy your life and your kids. Not always being afraid of the next outburst. You can join by clicking on the link in the show notes or on the website.

Anouk:
Hi, Victor. Welcome to the podcast. I'm really glad to have you today. I think we're gonna talk on the subject that is mean, probably a bit forgotten. So I'm really glad to have you here today.

Victor Antunez:
I'm glad to be here, Anouk. Thank you for having me.

Anouk:
So to start, can you tell me a little bit more of why you're doing what you're doing?

Victor Antunez:
I'm Victor Antunes. I'm based in Miami. I have a 6 year old autistic daughter, and I'm a real estate agent. So I blog quite a bit about the intersection of real estate and autism. And because of just different experience in my life, I decided to write a book about it. The first one was about relocating with an autistic or special needs child, and it was based on my personal experience. And then once we were relocated in the new home, there's also the process of getting your house to be autism friendly, sensory friendly. So I wrote another book about that.

Anouk:
So, you know, you can find it in my blog, miamiautismdad.com, and there, you know, I blog. It's mostly about Miami. I'll be very honest, but I do blog about things that do have a lot of carryover no matter what neighborhood you're in, and you can also find my books there.

Anouk:
Right. Super interesting. And so how does the and I just want to, like, start by saying because not everybody in our, are the listeners of the podcast have autistic children. But I think that what you're gonna share applies too much more than just autistic children. It applies also to the eye sensitive kids, and a lot of the emotionally intense kid do have some like sensitivity more intensely than other kids. So I think lots of what we're gonna talk about today can apply to much more than just autistic kids. So I just want the listeners to just not stop listening because they don't have an autistic child. And also

Anouk:
So sensory sensitive kids, it will apply to any any of those kids under that big umbrella.

Anouk:
Yeah. Exactly. And I think in the, emotionally intense kids that parents that I talk to, lots of their kids do have some sensitive issues to some Intense, so I think it will apply to a lot of them. So just wanted to leave that little thing here because I know it's not the same for everybody. Okay. Like, autism is not the reality for everyone listening. So I would No.

Anouk:
It's not.

Anouk:
No. But I I and then still and also, there's a lot like, right now, we're seeing more and more kids being diagnosed later in life, and we Briere realizing that autism is different than what we thought it is. And, I think that's also, like, some might have kids that will they will learn in 10 years that are autistic too. It's possible, because it's, like, there's different level and different ways to express, like, that autism can show. So it's not always clear from a, like, young age. Like, I'm guessing it was for your daughter since she's 6 and already diagnosed. It was pretty clear young, but it's not always the case. So sometimes your kids can be autistic and you just don't know.

Victor Antunez:
Well, my daughter, she was born quite typical. And it was around 2 years of age where her behavior just just completely changed. And as first time parents, my wife and I, we just thought, oh, it's just cute behavior because, you know, we had nothing to, to gauge by. And it was actually my mother-in-law who told us, you need to have that girl checked because she's just not developing right. So, I would tell a lot of parents, if if you're a first time parent and your child's behavior just all of a sudden just changes dramatically, have your kid diagnosed because, you know, I do quite you know, obviously, I have an autistic child. I do quite a bit of reading on this subject. And, a lot of kids are just not diagnosed. Like, underdiagnosis is a big problem.

Anouk:
Mhmm. And, part of the problem with that is that if your kid is not diagnosed, then all of the public services that that you may be entitled to wherever you live, they're not gonna have access because you have to have the diagnosis. And then at least in the states, you get what's called an IEP, an individualized education plan. And then based on that, you'll get your child get the services that they need, but you can't get the IEP until you have the diagnosis. So, it's just critical for parents, you know, if your child's behavior just changes dramatically or it's not difficult milestones for their age, have them diagnosed. I mean, it's kinda scary. You know, It probably it stressed my wife out a lot more than me, but I'm older than her, so I was able to just to handle it mentally better. But it's better to know than to not know.

Anouk:
You know?

Anouk:
Yeah. Yeah. That's I I do I did a podcast with some of that content already, explaining why. But I think also it depends on a lot of factor for sure. And some kids that it shows than the norm. Some kids it's not as obvious, though I think that's also a challenge sometimes. And they can be misdiagnosed. And I I I lived that true in in my house.

Anouk:
We got lots of misdiagnosed before we got the right diagnosis. So sometimes it can be a struggle. And so how does, like, the environment we live in, our house, how does that impact, children?

Anouk:
Well, it's a huge impact. Let me give you an example. Her, my daughter's therapist, he, he asked us, okay. Bring me a photo of her play area. Okay. So we we brought a photo, and my wife and I, we are quite proud of the play area because we had bought these foam flooring mats. And, they're like checkerboard colors, and there's, like, 4 different colors. And we had, you know, each color was different.

Anouk:
You know, like, it was yellow, then blue, then red, then green. And when the therapist saw that, he says, no. No. That's no good. That's too many colors. You're just going to just overload your daughter. So what you need to do is put all the greens together, all the yellows together, all the blues together, all the reds together. And, so we followed his instructions and when we did it, I have to admit to you, you know, even a non autistic person, when I looked at it, I found it quite relaxing to have it like that.

Anouk:
So, you know, there are just very obvious things that, you know, when you're new to it, they're not obvious. But once you follow the therapist, recommendations, like, oh, yeah. That's very calming. So so that was that was a big one for us.

Anouk:
So it's

Anouk:
things like that.

Anouk:
So simple also, like and it's something that

Anouk:
we see

Anouk:
We see often. And and what we're describing, those tiles on the floor, I think so many people have that in their house. And lots of like, most of the time, they're displayed that way, like a puzzle with all the colors and stuff. I think it's just something what we see, and we replicate that without necessarily thinking much of it much of it. But as you said, you put that like that and you're, oh, it's less stimulating. And I think that applies to every children might benefit sometimes from listening to you. Oh,

Anouk:
yes. Yeah. Yeah. And then, like, we put, some cushions on the wall, and the colors are very a light baby blue and a very light pink, and it's also just very calming, you know, for her and for us. So these are just things that when you reach out to the experts, then it's obvious to them because they work with every single day. But you as a new parent, it's like, obvious. But once you do it, like, oh, yeah. It's very common.

Anouk:
Yeah.

Anouk:
And it's interesting about about, like, the checkerboard colors.

Anouk:
Mhmm.

Anouk:
No. You wouldn't know. Then, like, the checkerboard colors, you've seen the autism, like, the autism sign. Right? It's like it's like, puzzle pieces.

Anouk:
Mhmm. A

Anouk:
lot of autistic people don't like that. They find it quite disturbing. So it's interesting that that what is the symbol, you know, international symbol of autism, a lot of autistic people don't like it. And then when you hear that complaint, like, I can understand why they wouldn't like it because all those colors can be a little bit upsetting. I, you know, I I gotta admit.

Anouk:
Yeah. Interesting. And I will I don't I've never really thought of who created that, but lots of the time it's not coming from autistic people. Like, it so it might be yeah. It it's something that I think it's an entire subject in itself, but it's, definitely interesting to see that sometimes things like that are not coming from people that are directly touched by the situation and might not represent really what they feel for

Anouk:
sure. Yeah. So in fact, if you look at the new autism symbol, it's a figure of 8, which is the infinity symbol.

Anouk:
Mhmm.

Anouk:
And it's, it's like the colors of the rainbow, but they blend into each other. And that is actually quite, calming that Intense symbol with the colors. So I like that much better. So that I hope that catches on because I it is very calming whereas the puzzle pieces, not so much.

Anouk:
Mhmm. Mhmm. Yeah. Makes sense. Totally makes sense. And Yeah. Is there any any other things, any other example that you can give that you, like, maybe what what sign parents can see in their kids that point to the fact that reorganizing their physical space might be a good idea?

Anouk:
Oh, wow. The thing about autistic kids is that they're all different. It's like, you know, like, you take, like, a a typical human Briere. Like, you're different than me. We're gonna have very just different taste. And then you're gonna have nonverbal kids like my kid and verbal kids. So, obviously, verbal kids, they, you know, they can verbalize something, and they can tell you they can even tell you what they think is good. Now in terms of the house, you know, we spoke about earlier, the biggest consideration is the neighborhood over the house because houses can't be fixed.

Anouk:
Mhmm. Like, you know, if you move into a house and let's say the house is is painted red on the Intense. Well, that's an easy fix. You just get a painter and you can paint it to whatever calming color you want. But if you're in a noisy neighborhood next to a highway, well, you can't fix that. You know? It's not very fixable. So I tell people is begin with the neighborhood and work in.

Anouk:
Mhmm. So if they they need to move or if it's really, their kids is really dysregulated or overstimulated, looking at moving house might be a need for the family, basically. And the out there in might not be adaptable. Is that what you're saying because of the neighborhood?

Anouk:
Yes. Yeah. In fact, I like, I'll I'll speak more about the highways. I just brought it up. A very, common thing with autistic kids is wandering. They call it excursions. Well, they'll just leave the house and they'll just walk away. In fact, there was a case here in Miami, like a week or 2 ago where this 14 year old autistic boy, the mom sends him out side to take out the garbage.

Anouk:
And, one of the neighbors has got a camera, and you see the boy walk outside the house, put the garbage in the garbage, and then he just leaves. He just left the house, and they didn't find him until the next day in an Apple store nearby. But the kid was just gone, and he's 14. He's verbal, but he's just, like, in his own little world. And, you know, at 14, you're very vulnerable. So, you know, that kid could just as easily walked in into the highway. And in fact, maybe, like, a few months ago, a 10 year old boy in Miami, he fell into the Miami Briere. And just by the grace of God, a Miami policeman was watching him, ran over, jumped in the river, and saved this boy from the river.

Anouk:
That boy, 10 years old, he probably was not a swimmer. He was gonna drown. So these are just considerations that when you're picking a neighborhood you know, like, if you're in a place like Miami, there's a lot of water hazards, well, that should be a very big consideration because drowning is I think it's the number one cause of death with autistic kids. You know, accidental death. Mhmm. It's, it's drowning. And then this wandering is a big problem with autistic kids. So if you're in a neighborhood with a lot of traffic, you should also, you know, just take that into consideration as far as your home, you know, your home situation is concerned.

Anouk:
Mhmm. Mhmm. So and so, for example, if people are choosing to move, like, on general, kids that are highly sensitive or autistic kids don't necessarily do well with change. So moving is stressful for anybody. How do you deal with that with the kids that struggle with change from a from a starting point?

Anouk:
You know, it depends on the kid. Let's let's assume that they're verbal or nonverbal. You should begin talking to your kid about this way ahead of time. And don't assume that just because they're nonverbal, that they're not understanding you. Now granted, a 10 year old like my daughter, she's 6 she's autistic. She is not going to understand at the same level of a 6 year old typical child.

Anouk:
Mhmm.

Anouk:
But at some level, she will understand. At what level? I don't even know. It's impossible to know. Mhmm. So the first thing to tell parents is as far ahead of time as possible, be talking to your child of this upcoming change. And then let's say that you're gonna be flying to your new home. Well, if this is gonna be your child's first trip to the airport, take them there. Oops.

Anouk:
Flying for your, right. If you have to fly, then if possible, take your child there 1 or 2 times before the actual trip. That way, when they go to this new environment, it's not their very first time. And if you can interact with airport employees because for your child, having these people in uniform could be a little bit scary because

Anouk:
So, you addressed, the wandering aspect and the water safety. You also briefly talked about noise in the neighborhood. Mhmm. Can you just talk a little bit more about that that part? The why Sure. Noise is a can be a problem?

Anouk:
Okay. So, you know, different autistic kids are gonna have different sensitivities.

Anouk:
Mhmm.

Anouk:
Like, my daughter, she happens to love fireworks. I mean, she can't get enough fireworks, but, you know, we we, accustomed her to that from a very young age. But there are other kids that no matter what you do, the the slightest sound is gonna set them off. So, you know, you need to know your child because you are literally the expert in your child. So what I tell people when moving to a new neighborhood is that the home can be fixed much easier than the neighborhood.

Anouk:
Yep. Yep.

Anouk:
Right? You know, if if the colors in the house are off, well, you can just paint the house. That's not a problem.

Anouk:
Mhmm.

Anouk:
But if you live in a noisy neighborhood and your kid is, you know, hypersensitive, well, you can't really fix that. So, you know, start start with the neighborhood and then then work inwards towards the house is the advice I would give parents as far as, like, noise. You know, and also it's, you know, like my daughter likes going to the park and I like taking her there. And, one thing that's a problem with her and my 4 year old as well who's not autistic is, they like to just run off. So I don't go to parks unless it's fenced. Because that way, I can just let them run as much as they want. Mhmm.

Anouk:
But I'll

Anouk:
have them be a helicopter parent. So, you know, these are just things you should look for in a neighborhood.

Anouk:
Mhmm. Mhmm. Is there anything else that you would recommend looking for other than fence park noise, security, but, like, big roads and water?

Anouk:
Yeah. Big roads. In fact, we just had a recent case. This 14 year old boy, he's autistic. His mother sent him to take the garbage out.

Anouk:
Mhmm.

Anouk:
Well, one of the neighbors across the street had one of those Briere doorbell cameras. So you see the boy, he walks out. He puts the garbage, you know, in the garbage can, and then he just walks off. And then later that day, they found him, like, a few miles away at a shopping center. He had found his way to one of the Apple stores and, you know, one of the employees because they we had what's called an Amber Briere. Whenever a child goes missing, they'll stop an Amber Alert and everybody's notified.

Anouk:
Mhmm.

Anouk:
And this person, he's looking at this little boy, you know, playing with computers. He's like, I think that this

Anouk:
is the boy. It's the description.

Anouk:
Yeah. So so, you know, it's it's called eloping. So if you have a child who's prone to eloping, then you might wanna really reconsider whether you should live on a busy street. Now, unfortunately, this boy, you know, he wasn't in a high, high traffic street, but he was in a high traffic area, you know. So, fortunately, he, you know, he, he was okay when he was found, but that's another consideration is, if your child is is prone to eloping, you know, are the streets safe? You know, because, you know, that mother, she thought, you know, he's 14. I'll send him to take the garbage out. He's probably done it a ton of times before. You know, what could go wrong? Well, this time, he, you know, he walked off.

Anouk:
So, you know,

Anouk:
he's in the same. Yeah. And I would say that's a consideration for many kids. Like, ADHD kids can also

Anouk:
Of course.

Anouk:
Have that tendency of just Yes. Wanting to wanting that liberty and just running running really fast to go to anything. So that's a concern for a lot of kids for sure.

Anouk:
Yeah. So that's another thing to look out for.

Anouk:
Yeah. And lots of kids that are more sensitive, more intense or autistic kids, they don't necessarily do do well with change. So if family needs to move, do you have any recommendation to help smooth the transition, basically?

Anouk:
Well, I mean, first, as much as possible, include your child in the moving process. Now, you know, I'll use my my my daughter as an example. She's nonverbal, and, it's hard to get eye contact out of her. So I don't you know, when I talk to her, I'm not really sure how much is penetrating. But even so, we include her in everything. We tell, okay, Chloe, we're gonna go do this now. Chloe, we're gonna go here now.

Anouk:
You

Anouk:
know, we we always let her know. And at at some level, it does penetrate because that that does help.

Anouk:
Mhmm.

Anouk:
So, if you're gonna be moving, you definitely wanna include your child, you know, and don't assume don't assume because you don't know how much is getting in, but something is getting in.

Anouk:
Yeah. And even with, like, babies, babies do understand not necessarily the word and the content, but they understand the energy that we put behind things.

Anouk:
Yes.

Anouk:
So Yes. Kids with like, autistic kids at 6, even if their development, like, the emotional development might be a bit delayed, or they have, language, like, struggle or and of any sort, they can still understand a lot of things, probably much more than we think they do. Yeah. In fact.

Anouk:
We we don't know. So I just always assume that, you know, always treat your children like they are a complete adult, a complete human being, and that they understand everything, which obviously we know they don't. But, you know, how much they get, you know, we would never know. So, in terms of, like, the actual travel day, if you're flying and they've never been to an airport, it'd be a good idea to go there a few days before and get them acclimated to the airport environment, and if you can, interact with some employees. Now, more and more airlines, they've got autism friendly services, but you've gotta call ahead of time. Because if you show up on the day of, well, you know what? You're kinda, like, you know, you're, you know, you're gambling that they're gonna be ready for you or they're not. Mhmm. And in fact, like, the Miami International Airport, they've got a room, reserved just for autistic kids.

Anouk:
They've got a badge they can give the kids. So when they walk around, they're they're giving, you know, a a preferential treatment and, you know, just it's easier to get through security and all that. Mhmm. But you've gotta call ahead of time. Yeah. So, you know, these are things that, you know, do before the travel day. Interact with employees. Let the airline know so they can prepare for you.

Anouk:
Let the airport know so they can prepare for you. Now if you're driving, you know, I'm gonna assume that your kid has probably been in the car a ton of times. But if you're going for a, like, let's say, cross state, you know, make sure you take a lot of the the their their comfort toys and all you know, just the the different things that you know are gonna make that trip a lot easier.

Anouk:
Yeah. For It's not like any big trip or long Briere, pack extra stuff to help them transition and kill time.

Anouk:
Right. And like in Florida, we have some highways that have got a lot of rest stations Mhmm. And some that don't. So, you know, if you're in an area like that where you just know that these highways have got a lot of rest areas dedicated, you know, and some don't, you know, maybe choose when it does have it. Now here in Florida, the one that has the rest stations, it's a paid toll road, so you will pay. But under those circumstances, I would consider it a very worthwhile investment.

Anouk:
Yeah. Yeah. It's not necessarily I'm I'm guessing it's not a huge amount also to

Anouk:
No. It's not free. It's not free. But you get something for your money. You get extra Briere stations, and they're nice, and they're set up for tourists, and they're lighted, and there's a police presence. So it's it's very I find it worth it. Mhmm.

Anouk:
Mhmm. Yeah. If you cannot stop, it can be a challenge for sure, if it's a long road.

Anouk:
So it's worth it. You know, the the other highways that don't have these dedicated rail stations, of course, there's exits you can get off, but you never know what you're you're gonna find. You know? It might be a nice place. It might be dirty. It might, you know, it might be noisy and crowded. It might not be. Whereas on the paid roads, it's all very nice and controlled and quiet and set up with bathrooms and all this. So it's, you know, it's a worthwhile investment.

Anouk:
So these are kind of things that, you know, that you can plan ahead of time or, you know, your autistic kid and even your neurotypical kids if they're little.

Anouk:
Mhmm. Mhmm. I would say here, rest stop are not really nice, but they're all free. Yeah. That's life. Great. And any other recommendation for the move or is the covers it?

Anouk:
I mean, obviously, you know, if you're buy you know, I'll tell you what's happening now. It happened with the COVID and it's still continuing. A lot of people are buying homes sight unseen, which there was a time when that never happened. And now it's happening more. Yes. People are buying. They're moving from California to Florida without ever stepping foot in the home, which is just amazing, but, you know, I'm not gonna judge because I don't I don't know their circumstances. So if at all possible, even a trusted kid, it would be a really good idea to come ahead of time, make sure you like the neighborhood, make sure you like the house.

Anouk:
Because, you know, a house can be a you know, a house can be great in pictures, and then when you get there, it's not exactly what you thought it would be.

Anouk:
Yeah.

Anouk:
So, you know, sight unseen is is fine if you don't have kids. But if you have kids, I would say that's probably not the best way to buy a house. Although, like I said, more and more people are doing it, which I just find amazing. But, you know, if you have autistic kids or ADHD, then you definitely wanna come ahead of time and make sure that that house is everything it is in pictures. Because, you know, stepping in a house, you know, and the house, if it's just, you know, an older couple, it might just be fine Mhmm. On the photos. But then you get there with an autistic kid, you're like, oh, wait a minute. This color doesn't work.

Anouk:
This room doesn't work. This layout doesn't work. And you just might not get that sense from the photos.

Anouk:
Yeah. Yeah. And definitely hard harder to under like, get a feel for the neighborhood if you've never been in person because Google map is limited. Yeah.

Anouk:
They know it. It's getting better every day, but there's nothing like there's nothing like stepping foot in the neighborhood.

Anouk:
Nothing at all. Definitely. I can say, like, we moved last year, and we were out something. And sometimes I I got somewhere and was like, oh, I thought the neighbors were were way farther than they are in fact from Google Maps. Like, it's not a 100% that. And the the pictures are often, like, better than than real life when you look at pictures of the listings. It's part of the selling process.

Anouk:
It's like people's, profile pictures on Facebook or whatever. Exactly. They always look better in the pictures. So the same thing for a house. Yeah. We

Anouk:
we show our best side for sure.

Anouk:
Of course.

Anouk:
And you do have a book. Can you would you like to talk a bit about that?

Anouk:
Sure. So, you know, based on my own experience, I wrote a book called the autism and special needs family relocation blueprint. And in that, you know, I I cover everything. The pre move phase, checklist, I talk about traveling by air, by car, you know, finding a new house, working with a real estate agent, how to look for schools, how to look for support groups. So these are all things that, that, you know, with autistic kids, ADHD, or or other, you know, developmental, you know, disabilities, it's, you know, it it'd be a very good, tool to have in your toolbox. And, you know, I forget right now the price. It's it's maybe 15, $20 on Amazon. And, you know, if you're making this kind of move, just the checklist alone would make it highly valuable.

Anouk:
And, you know, full disclosure, I don't make that much money off on these books.

Anouk:
No.

Anouk:
But, you know, they're more they're more of, like, just a service to the community. And, you know, for the small investment, it's definitely worth it.

Anouk:
Great. And we'll put the link in the show notes so that people can, check it out. Is there anything you wanna add before we close?

Anouk:
No. You know, I think that we've done a very good job as far as, you know, covering the neighborhoods, covering travel,

Anouk:
covering

Anouk:
the houses. And then, you know, I I talked Godbout, you know, again, in the book, I've got checklists for how to find different schools and support groups and, and therapy options. Like, in Miami, you know, in Miami, it's Miami Dade County. It's a very big county. There's a lot of municipalities. And there are some areas where I love the houses, I love the neighborhoods, but they're newer. And because of that, they don't have, the established hospitals and therapy centers. So you might get a fantastic neighborhood, you might get a fantastic house, but you might end up having to drive half an hour or more to your kids' therapy sessions or schools.

Anouk:
So, you know, these are all the considerations to take. And in fact, I would tell people that when your kids are in the grade school level, that's when it's really, really valuable to live in the same neighborhood where the school is located. Because when they're that small, you're just gonna be involved in more school events. Whereas, when they hit the middle school and high school, you know, kids, no matter what their developmental stage, they just become more and more independent. So, you know, when your kid's in junior high school or high school, you could live half an hour away and it it it might not affect as much. Whereas, when you're at the grade school level, you know, if you're not in the same neighborhood, you're just gonna be you know, because there's so many more school events at that age. Mhmm. You're gonna find yourself driving a lot.

Anouk:
So that is a really big consideration when the kids are little is, as much as possible, try to be where the schools are located. And and like I said, in Miami, there are some newer neighborhoods that are just I love them. Big parks, everything, but there's no schools for the autistic kids. So these are all just trade offs. You know, in fact, there's this economist I like to listen to. He says there's no perfect solutions. There's only trade offs. So, you know, you as a parent of one of these kids, you know, when you find the perfect house, you know, maybe it's not the perfect neighborhood.

Anouk:
So there's always just these trade offs.

Anouk:
Yeah. Yeah. We it's rare that we find the place where all the services we need are and the perfect neighborhood and the perfect house. We don't need to touch anything. And yeah. That's

Anouk:
Very rare.

Anouk:
Happens very rarely for sure. Yeah. Yes. Yes. And I think that's very interesting. And also for some kids that might not qualify for special classes or special schools, if they need accommodation, not all schools are willing or set up to accommodate special needs kids. So I think that's a very great recommendation also to before moving, checking with the different schools if it's something they can't accommodate for. Of course, you never really know before you try, but you can have an idea when you ask what kind of accommodation are doable, or if you ask for the accommodation you know your kids need.

Anouk:
And the reaction that you get will give you an idea for sure if they can accommodate or not.

Anouk:
Yes. And if you can, obviously, you know, visit the school as well. Because it's one thing to talk over the phone. It's another thing to go in person and just see. Feel the vibe. Because, you know, you go to a into a school, you can feel the vibe, and that's always a good thing to do.

Anouk:
Yeah. Same as neighborhood, basically.

Anouk:
Yes. Same as neighborhoods. You can feel the vibe.

Anouk:
Great. Thank you. Is there any, resource that you used as a parent that you would like to share that you find useful?

Anouk:
You know what? I use Google alerts, actually. I'll go in there and I'll set it up, and I'll put, like, autism friendly events, sensory events. I'll I'll put museums and music festivals and all things like this in the neighborhood.

Anouk:
Mhmm.

Anouk:
And, you know, and you can do that for wherever you live in the world instead of Google Earth. So I use Google Earth quite a bit, and a lot of events come up that, you know, I don't I don't read the newspaper every day, nor do I plan on doing that. And that'd be the only one of the way to do it. But if you set up Google, alerts, this is a fantastic way to plug into the community, and it arrives in your mailbox, you know, every morning, every week, whatever you set it up for. So that's a fantastic free resource that you could use anywhere in the world.

Anouk:
Interesting. So that basically your you have your own personal, like Concierge? Yeah. Concierge or like

Anouk:
Yeah.

Anouk:
Or, like, organizer from it it looks a bit like people in, like yeah. It's a cut like, I'm kind of current Sears. Like, people in a, touristic place, and we'll give you your personal schedule. That's great. And so that you Yes. And often, we realize those events append when it's too late. When it happens, it's too late. It's tomorrow, and we've planned something else and things like that.

Anouk:
So I love the idea. Right. As soon as they people register them on Google, you get informed, basically. That's how it works. I've never used that.

Anouk:
So let me tell you, you can use Google alerts for anything.

Anouk:
I mean,

Anouk:
I even have I even have one set up for my name. I wanna know whenever my name shows up at the Internet. And most of the time it's another Victor Antunes, but it's just, you can use Google alerts. But in particular with autistic kids or just even family friendly events, you can set it up and get this fantastic resource delivered right to your mailbox. So it's it's a fantastic resource that I use all the time.

Anouk:
Yeah. Super interesting. Thank you. And is there a specific place? I don't even know how to set that up. It's easy to find, I'm guessing. You just Google how to set up Google alerts.

Anouk:
Right. And you have to have a Gmail account. Yeah. So if you have a Gmail account, if you just type in Google alerts, the site will come up, and then you can just set up the alerts. And you can put the frequency in, and it's pretty self explanatory. It's it's very user friendly.

Anouk:
Great. Interesting resource. Thank you. I love asking that question to parent. I'll I'll it comes with, like, all sorts of different, resource I find really interesting. So thank you very much. So people can find you, we'll put the link for the books. Is there somewhere else that people can find you?

Anouk:
Sure. I blog at my website. It's miamiautismdad.com, and you can find me there.

Anouk:
Great. Excellent. That will also be in the show notes. So thank you so much, Victor, for being here with us today.

Anouk:
You're welcome.

Anouk:
Really appreciate it. I am

Anouk:
so glad you joined me today and took that time out of your intense life to focus on finding a new way to parent that works for you and your kids. To get the episodes at Soon as they drop, make sure to subscribe to the podcast.

Anouk:
And please leave everything in review so other parents can find it too. Also, check out all

Anouk:
the free resources on my website at familymoments. Ca so you can take action on what's the most important for you right now. And take a deep breath. Keep going. We're all in this together.